THREE WAYS TO ENJOY THE COOLER WEATHER (2003)

1. Take a brisk walk.
2. Turn on the heat.
3. Practice fire safety.

——————————————————————

THE PRACTICE IS DIRE-

IN LIGHT OF THE RECENT FIRES!

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THREE OCCASIONS TO SLOW DOWN ON THE HIGHWAY (2003)

1. Heavy rain with low visibility.

2. Icy conditions with slippery consequences.

3. Thick fog with no visibility beyond your steering wheel.
——————————————-

In the wake-

Of safety’s sake.

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THREE GREAT WAYS TO ORDER SPAM (2003)

1. With scrambled eggs.

2. On a sandwich with tomatoes added.

3. Stop filling up my e-mail.
——————————————-

To confess-

You’re making a mess.

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THREE THINGS TO GO APE OVER (2003)

1. Higher utility bills.
2. Higher insurance rates.
3. Poachers who are diminishing the population of the worlds’ great apes.

——————————————————————

UNLESS DRAMATIC MEASURES ARE TAKEN THE MONKEY THAT WE SEE-

MAY ONE DAY NO LONGER BE!

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THREE WAYS THAT TENNIS PLAYING IS JUST FINE (2003)

1. You have the right equipment.
2. You have the time to play and watch.
3. A tournament is not going on right in your backyard.

———————————————————-

EVERYONE IS UP FOR THE SERVE-

AS LONG AS THE NOISE CAN TAKE

A DETOUR AND SWERVE!

 

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THREE WAYS TO ACQUIRE A SIX FIGURE YEARLY PAYCHECK (2003)

1. Go to college and work your way up the ladder.

2. Hope to inducted and become a member of the good old
buddy system with other members of a company or
group who receive such salaries.

3. Take a shot at the new reality show, The Apprentice,
where Donald Trump is looking for a new employee.
—————————————————–
In real life one can find their niche-
Out of the poorhouse into the land of the rich!

 

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THREE REASONS THAT THE OLD SOCIAL STUDIES AND/OR HISTORY TEXTBOOKS IN TEXAS SHOULD BE UPDATED (2003)

1. Materials for the new Texas Assessment of
Knowledge and Skills test should be included
and repeated on a regular basis.

2. Every child should be entitled to have enough
space inside the cover in order to write their
name, the year the book was used, and to list whether
or not it is new or used.

3. The answer to the question of who is the present
Governor of Texas is not Ann Richards.
—————————————————–

A HISTORY TEXTBOOK SHOULD CONTINUE ON-
AND NOT JUST COVER THE PAST EVENTS THAT
ARE OVER AND GONE!

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